Lifeboat

Katrina Kaye

The first time
I held death
in the salt water of lung
hopeful to be pulled
on raft and have air
pressed into chest.

The second time I pushed
under the water.

I let go
knowing full well there was
no point in waiting for a
kind hand.

I will not give
the satisfaction to mourn
death or save life,

not when I can still
keep head above water.

I may have been made
a fool for carrying crosses,
but I earned them.

They keep me afloat.

These storms leave
such peace
in their wake.

“Lifeboat” is previously published in Chasing Rabbits (2012).